The Secret To Finding Contentment In Your Home (Even If Your Home Is Not Instagram or Pinterest Worthy)

Are you unhappy and dissatisfied with your home? Do you wish your home looked like the houses on Instagram? In this post, I will show you how to find happiness and contentment in your home, no matter what stage it’s in.

What is contentment? The Cambridge Dictionary defines happiness and satisfaction, often because you have everything you need. The rise of Instagram and social media made us feel like our home is inadequate or not good enough.

We don’t feel satisfied with our home and keep wanting more. If I have a big house, a big walk-in closet, the list goes on, I’ll be happy. But the reality is, even if you have all those things, you’ll never be content or satisfied. Why? Because being content is a mindset. Being content starts with changing your perspective and attitude.

I love this bible verse from Philippians 4:12 “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what is it to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well-fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or want”. I firmly believe that, just like when Paul was in prison, you can find happiness wherever you live or in your current situation.

On the other hand, some people are still dissatisfied and unhappy even when you have the biggest and most beautiful home. Contentment is internal, not external. It’s a choice. You can choose to follow your heart, but the bible warns “The heart is deceitful above all things.” (Jeremiah 17:9) or you can count your blessings and be grateful for what you have.

The truth is, it’s good that we don’t always get what we want. Why? Because we learn to appreciate the things that we do have. It helps us to have a better character. Imagine a child who gets everything she ever wants, she will become an ungrateful, spoiled brat.

If we have everything we want, we will keep wanting more, and makes us even more unhappy and discontent.

So the question is, how do we find contentment in our imperfect home? Read on and I will share the secret to finding happiness and contentment in your home.

Avoid comparison.

What triggers your discontentment with your home? Is it Instagram, Facebook, or HGTV? Figure out what’s causing you to feel this way. Take a break from Instagram for a few days or weeks if you have to.

Social media can be a good thing when you use the correct way. Don’t get me wrong, I too feel guilty about browsing through Instagram and wish my house was bigger or an oceanfront home. We all want what we don’t have, right?

I use Instagram and Pinterest for inspiration and tools to improve my decorating skills. I enjoy looking at other homes and how they style it and ask myself “How can I apply that to my house?”. It can be as easy as switching my throw pillows or vases and using what I already have.

Write down a list of the things you love about your home.

The key to happiness and contentment is to focus on what you have instead of the things you don’t have. Most of us focus on the negative instead of the positive. Let’s go back to the definition of contentment, contentment means happiness and satisfaction, often because you have everything you need.

I love the last line of that phrase, it means you are satisfied because we have everything we need. It did not say because we have everything we want. Focus on the positive aspects, such as shelter, comfort, safety, and the memories you create there.

Practice gratitude by writing down the things you love about your home. For example, I like that our home has an open space, views of the water, a big backyard, and a long driveway so my kids can play and create memories. To download the free gratitude bundle please click HERE.

Don’t overemphasize minor imperfections.

People tend to make a minor flaw seem bigger than it is. For example, our dining room table is 10 years old. The kids use it as a craft table as well. Over time, our dining table has visible wear like scuffs and marks. This has been bothering me for a while now.

I’ve been shopping for a table and couldn’t find one I like. Hubby told me that the table still works, there’s no need to replace it. And he was right. I couldn’t accept the flaws. But then I realized that I was making a big deal of it instead of focusing on the big picture.

This is a struggle that I am still learning to overcome. I am a perfectionist and it bothers me if something is not perfect. Is this something you struggle with?

The grass is not always greener on the other side.

I recently watched very successful YouTubers who are quitting YouTube. I was so curious and wanted to find out the reason behind this. What I found out was, that people are quitting because they are so stressed out to that point that it’s affecting their mental health. They have anxiety attacks because they have to become better and better. It’s a toxic cycle and unsustainable.

As a small YouTuber, earning a full-time income on YouTube would be a dream. But everything comes with a cost. It costs them their mental health and their time with their family.

My kids love water. My daughter used to go to her friend’s house to go swimming. I told hubby that I’d love to have our pool so we can all go swimming in the summer. Hubby did not like the idea at first but he finally agreed to get one as long as I would be in charge of maintenance.

We assembled the pool about two years ago. I did not realize how much time and energy it would take to maintain a pool. I had to clean it every morning because they are so many bugs and leaves in the pool. I also have to maintain the chemistry to avoid algae.

What I mean is, that I used to envy people who have pool. Now, I know what a hassle it is to own a pool. I’m not sure if I’d want to have a pool again. In my opinion, the headaches outweigh the benefits of having one.

Think of the people who have huge houses and luxury cars. You don’t know what’s behind closed doors. They may need to work 60-80 hours weekly to pay their mortgage and other debts. They are trapped because they live above their means.

Yet, those people are still unhappy and unfulfilled. Material things will not bring you joy. It will bring you temporary happiness or dopamine. When the excitement wears off, you’re back to wanting more stuff.

Declutter.

Isn’t this the opposite of wanting more? It sure is. One of the main reasons that our home feels small is because we have way too much stuff. My husband is a minimalist and I like to shop. You could say that we are total opposites. I love to buy stuff while he loves to get rid of stuff.

I come from a family that did not have much. So when we do have money, my mom would shop and buy things from thrift stores. I’ve never heard of decluttering and minimalism growing up. It was all about getting stuff.

Our house had a lot of knick-knacks. Our China cabinet was filled with Tupperware and other dishes that we only use when we have guests. It was taking a lot of space and just collected dust.

Now I realize I buy too much stuff because I couldn’t pass up a good deal. It’s exciting. But recently, I had to clear out our basement to turn one of the rooms into a guest bedroom. I was so overwhelmed to the point that it gave me headaches and anxiety.

Keep your home clean and well-maintained.

Nothing puts me in a bad mood than a dirty home. A clean home makes me feel calm and think clearly. It makes me feel good and makes me appreciate our home more.

Do you have broken things in your home that need to be fixed? Do you have a leaky faucet or shower? One of the things that is preventing us from loving our home is broken things. Yes, things break so we have to maintain our home. Fixing or replacing a leaky faucet is cheaper than waiting until the problem worsens.

Additionally, if you’re bathroom or kitchen needs to be remodeled but you don’t have a budget yet, think of doing a small project like changing the faucet or light fixture. This is an inexpensive way of updating a room while you are still waiting to renovate the entire room.

When we renovated our kitchen, we started by painting the cabinet. Then we replaced the faucet and ceiling fan. Six years later, we finally decided to renovate the kitchen because of the layout. Three years ago, I’m still so pleased that we decided to tackle this project.

Being content with your home doesn’t mean we don’t do anything to improve our home. However, don’t make it a source of your happiness or joy. Don’t let it make you bitter or miserable if you can’t renovate your home. As I’ve mentioned, contentment starts from us, it doesn’t matter what’s around us.

Decorate with things that bring you joy.

Do you have a favorite artwork, vase, plant, or family picture? Incorporate those accessories into your space. This will immediately make you love your home. Imagine looking at the ugly picture on your wall every day. How would that make you feel?

I easily get distracted by the things I dislike. For example, when I see dust under the couch. The only way to solve the problem is to clean it once and for all.

I like to decorate using decor I like or love. This could also be as simple as fresh flowers from your garden or your favorite throw pillow. If you have an item that doesn’t bring you joy, it might be a good idea to donate or sell it.

What is your dream house? My dream home is a contemporary house with ocean views. How can you replicate that in your current home? By incorporating coastal decor and color into my space. I use rattan, woven decor, and tropical plants to remind me of a coastal home.

Invite people over.

Our homes are meant to be shared with the people we love. Hubby and I are working on being more hospitable. Our goal is to invite more people this year.

We haven’t been inviting many people because it makes me stressed and overwhelmed. I get stressed trying to come up with foods that people will like. I realize that I have to give myself grace and make easy food and maybe even buy a store-bought dessert.

I love the Italian lifestyle. Imagine having al fresco dining with wine and pizza surrounded by family and friends. This is my dream lifestyle, what’s yours?